Posted on

The Square Root of 3

That Jimmy who ate the world once told me, “You’ll sit alone forever If you wait for the right time, What are you hoping for?” That Jimmy also asked me not to give away the end, because it was the one thing that would stay mine.

I suppose i believed him and besides the music was incredible and it was titled “23” which just so happens to be my age, so i suppose he was talking to me.

Being alone around all the festivities for the past three days taught me a few very valuable lessons.

First, I can drink about four pints of beer before having to ask for a complimentary snack. Second, Animal Planet is simply the most wonderful channel on television today. Third, Vicky Cristina Barcelona is a pretty good movie.

I’m of the opinion that all stores should close on Valentine’s Day. In this way we could actually require the people who spend their (presumably) hard-earned money on flowers and chocolates to instead spend time with one another.

I am aware that any law enforcement official with even a smattering of common sense would violently oppose this. I thus project that this suggestion of mine is destined for disapproval.

Whatever be the law, the end would always be mine. Not fair, but to think i had to colour the context with Valentine’s Day to facilitate the discussion of my nemeisis. Sad, perhaps, but who says life’s fair?

The Square Root of 3

I’m sure that I will always be
A lonely number like root three

The three is all that’s good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine

For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic

I know I’ll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality

When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three

As quietly co-waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer

We break free from our mortal bonds
With the wave of magic wands

Our square root signs become unglued
Your love for me has been renewed.

From Harold and Kumar ; the sequel.


About Humbug

My past has a way of making my present feel jealous of the future.

3 responses to “The Square Root of 3

  1. Really loved the poem. Seriously, who’s the author?

  2. I dont know If I said it already but …This blog rocks! I gotta say, that I read a lot of blogs on a daily basis and for the most part, people lack substance but, I just wanted to make a quick comment to say I’m glad I found your blog. Thanks, 🙂

    …..Frank Scurley

  3. Savannah

    Awesome blog!

    I thought about starting my own blog too but I’m just too lazy so, I guess Ill just have to keep checking yours out.

Comments are closed.